SGTV Guideline 9: Always End The Phone Call First
Now, little did I know that a little known work practice I’d been following worked incredibly well for me in terms of my interaction with men I dated. It was only after I discovered this little rule that I thought wow!
I have this method of working in ‘time slots’ which is great for focus. Basically it’s an uninterrupted 25 mins of work, then break for 5 mins and then after 3 sets of 25 mins, I take a half hour break. So you’re probably thinking…What the connection with men?…Let me explain…
BTW It goes nicely with my previous guideline 8, on not calling men, here’s the guideline! Always End Phone Call First!
When he calls you, (remember you only get to occasionally return calls) you stay on the phone for a maximum of 10 minutes, after that , you got to go. Why? Cause you’re busy.
It just so happened because of my working methods, I actually use a countdown ie.e. online-stopwatch.com to manage my time, when the bell goes. I stop what I’m doing. So when returning calls to anyone in my break, when the bells goes, my time is up!
Now of course, the reason is you’re busy! but the real reason is you need to protect yourself from becoming emotionally attached, too quickly.
You don’t want to run the risk of baring your soul too quickly in a short period of time and talking to him like a girlfriend. You need to pace yourself and gift that side of you to someone who deserves it. You’re not an open book.
So be sweet and friendly and yes! Use a timer! Love has a way of making time go by ever so quickly, especially when you really like the guy! Using your timer will allow you to remain mysterious to him. You cutting the call first creates a ‘want’ in his mind, a desire to have more. So sweetly tell him that you have to go and let him wonder why you have to go. It will draw him closer to you as opposed to pushing him away.
When you create a ‘longing’ in a man, that’s the ‘space’ he needs to become crazy about you, cause he can’t get or have enough of you.
I remember a time, when I didn’t know about this guideline, had I known I would have implemented it straightaway. The control factor in my relationship had subtly changed with My BF and I remember recognising it had changed but didn’t know what to do about it. All of a sudden it was about meeting up on his terms. Had I know this little guideline, I would have used it and had him check him-self by me withdrawing myself and not calling or keeping my response short. He had got too confident of my love for him. I don’t let that happen anymore and of course using this little trick works a treat!
Some girls may say, it’s not a game, it’s not fair having this little bag of tricks. But all I can say is…is your way working? If it is go ahead. I’m not being cocky, it’s just that this stuff preserves your self-esteem and that’s all I want for you ladies. The surest way to lose a man is to make him the centre of your life and these ‘tricks’ ‘rules’ or ‘boundary setting guidelines’ as I like to call them stops you doing exactly that. It’s not your man’s job to make you happy. That’s your job. So don’t get it twisted.
One last thing, if you’re at home lonely as a sparrow on a Friday night, don’t let him know it. Let your phone ring out to voicemail, to give the impression that you’re out. The worst thing is to give the impression that you aren’t sought after or don’t have a life. In his world he should always catch you coming or going.
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